I first went to Café Sundae - held at Timperley Methodist Church - to support the Café's volunteer leader, Will Sudworth. I knew it was aimed at teenagers and assumed it would be painfully 'cool' and prepared myself for a long night. I couldn't have been more surprised at how much I enjoyed it. I loved the informal set up, and any church service where you can eat sweets and drink milkshakes gets my vote.

So after a good start it just got better. Film clips and vox pops kept me interested and engaged in a way I will admit that a sermon often doesn't. I enjoyed the table games because I got to talk to people at church about real issues rather than just saying hello and goodbye. However, the table debates were my favourite part of the evening – at last the chance to talk in church, to play an active rather than a passive role. I was so grateful for the chance to discuss issues that interested me in the context of my faith - I could have kissed the Café Sundae team for that! The mix of people at Café Sundae also resulted in me getting an insight into the views of a variety of ages and backgrounds.

Having enjoyed Café Sundae so much I was really excited when Will told me about Diversity Space. Although I was loving Café Sundae and pretending to be 14 again, I was also looking forward to talking about issues with over 18s.

Diversity Space has the same relaxed and informal feel as Café Sundae, but meeting in a local licensed coffee shop means we can have a glass of wine with our discussion too! Diversity Space offers a wonderful opportunity for us to talk about emotive and controversial issues in a safe environment where each of us has the chance to give our opinions without being judged.

I can also talk about my faith if I want to, but I don't feel pressured to have a particular opinion. It's also a space to bring friends without them feeling uncomfortable. In fact, I took my husband Matthew and two friends to the last one – I should get some sort of award!

Jackie Davies is Children and Families Worker with Altrincham Methodist Circuit.

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If you have something burning to say and want to contribute to the Share weekly guest blog, please contact Karen Carter. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and are not necessarily shared by the Church of England, the Methodist Church, the United Reformed Church, Church Army, Fresh Expressions or any of its partners.

Below is a re-wording of the main findings, using 'church language' to see if it helps our exploration of inherited church and fresh expressions.

The five stages of decline that proceed in sequence

Stage 1: Churches become insular

Church members believe their church is 'entitled' to exist, losing sight of the true factors that originally established it.

When people are saying 'We're established because we do these specific things' instead of the insightful 'We're established because we understand why we do these things and under what conditions they would no longer work', decline will very likely follow.

Stage 2: Undisciplined growth

When a church grows beyond its ability to fill key leadership roles with the right people, it has set itself up for a fall.

Stage 3: Denial of risk and peril

Internal warning signs mount, yet membership and attendance remain strong enough to 'explain away' disturbing data or to suggest that the difficulties are 'temporary' or 'cyclic'.

Church leaders start to blame external factors such as culture rather than accept responsibility.

The vigorous, fact-based dialogue that characterises healthy churches disappears altogether.

Stage 4: Solution grasping

Church leaders respond by grasping for quick solutions - eg, introducing a new charismatic visionary leader, instigating a dramatic cultural revolution, or merging established churches.

Initial results may appear positive, but the results do not last.

Stage 5: Irrelevance or closure

Repeatedly grasping for quick solutions erodes financial strength and individual spirit to such an extent that all hope of building a great future is abandoned.

In some cases, the church leaders just sell out; in other cases the church atrophies into insignificance; and in the most extreme cases, the church simply closes.

Specific findings relevant to fresh expressions of church

It's not as simple as 'they failed because they didn't change'. Churches that change constantly but without any consistent rationale also collapse. There's nothing wrong with keeping specific practices, but only if you understand the 'why' behind those practices, and thereby see when to keep them and when to change them.

To disrespect the potential remaining in the inherited church - or worse, to neglect it while focusing on fresh expressions in the belief that the inherited church will continue almost automatically - leads to decline. Even if you face the impending demise of the inherited church, that's still no excuse to let it just run on autopilot. Exit definitively or renew obsessively, but do not ever neglect it.

Hope

With a map of decline in hand, churches heading downhill might be able to reverse course.

The signature of the truly great is not the absence of difficulty, but the ability to come back stronger than before from even cataclysmic catastrophes.

Will Sudworth, volunteer leader, Café Sundae, Altrincham.

If you have something burning to say and want to contribute to the Share weekly guest blog, please contact Karen Carter. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and are not necessarily shared by the Church of England, the Methodist Church, the United Reformed Church, Church Army, Fresh Expressions or any of its partners.